Of Saying Good-Bye

"Guys, come here, I need to talk to you."

Micaiah started inching her way toward me, a sly grin on her face.  She's right, usually when I bring her and her brothers close to talk to them I'm telling them about something exciting that's going to happen - we're leaving that afternoon to go to Nenaw & Papaw's, we're going to pick up the toys so we can paint, we're going to the store (it doesn't take much, when you're four or less, to garner excitement).  It broke my heart knowing how out of place her current grin of anticipation was.

"Annie won't be coming home."

It was the sad news I had hoped not to have to share when we found the lump in our cat's abdomen on Sunday.  I had hoped making them say good-bye to her yesterday, while she moaned in her cage just before being shuttled off to the vet, was just a silly precautionary measure - more like a, "Have fun at the doctor; we'll see you soon!" kind of good-bye.

But it wasn't so.

At first the pronouncement that Annie wouldn't be returning from the doctor was a little bit of a shock to the two older ones and I debated whether to leave it at just that.  These are the tough calls a Mommy has to make when Daddy is at work and real life is unfolding before us.  So I decided to push through and be honest (well, as honest as a four-year-old and a two-year-old need).

"She's very sick and she's going to die."

At this my tears broke forth, indicating to Micaiah this was the proper response.  Thus, imitating me, she, too, wept for Annie.

For about ten full seconds.

And then, through the sobs, "Mommy, maybe we can do an activity."

"What kind of activity, Baby?" Was her soul more sensitive than I had anticipated? Was she already planning some sort of memorial?  Or was it simply-

"You know, an activity from The Box?"  Yep, just as I suspected. "The Box" being a cardboard box in which I keep craft kits for she and her brother to do on occasion.  Nothing cat or funeral-related there.  Just a fun thing to do now that we're done crying.

"Okay, Baby, sure."

Apparently these kinds of things are just easier on the young.

To be fair, they did ask a few more questions intermittently as the morning progressed and I did overhear this sweet conversation:

Emmett: "Why is Annie going to die, Sissy?"
Micaiah [in her most sweet, heartfelt voice]: "Because she's sick. Sometimes people, and animals, get sick."
Emmett: "But they don't die."
Micaiah: "Sometimes they do."

I know we'll still be answering questions in the most unexpected moments, as kids are known to have, but for now I'm glad this early brush with death was slightly less traumatic than we'd feared.  If only I could promise them this would be the last time we'd ever have this conversation.

Sometimes life gets hard.  And sometimes it's even harder than that.

Here's to the girl who wore her heart on her fur.

1,000 Gifts:
1110. A chance to say good-bye
1111. Simple understandings of not-so-simple things
1112. Understanding care-takers
1113. The way Joey's head rests in my lap as he sucks his thumb, tired from playing 
1114. Singing lullabies
1115. Learning to play the piano as I teach her
1116. Listening to her read

Of Nine Months with Joseph

Our littlest guy celebrated nine months of living yesterday.  He celebrated in typical fashion - by living life as a nine-month-old, which is exciting enough, in itself, when there is still so much world to discover.

At this point one might normally be able to say he has been out of the womb as long as he was in it, but considering our little Joey stayed cozily tucked up inside me for a ten-day extension, we won't be able to say that until Thanksgiving (which is now nine days away, what?!).

Considering all the development which occurred in that first nine months and ten days of existence - proceeding from a tiny fertilized egg into a being with a beating heart, arms, legs, toes, fingers, eyelashes and a soft dusting of hair, 9.5 pounds of squirmy, squishy, sleepy baby - it's hard to imagine any more miracle packed into so short a time.  Yet the nine months following his exit into our world have had their fair share of milestones.

He now has two teeth to boast of and even saw the scissors to his hair for the first time this past week (just for a little over-the-ears trim, nothing major).  On top of using his hands and knees to transport himself wherever he would like to be, his new favorite is pulling up to get a closer look at all that used to be out of reach - like his brother's lollipop or Mommy's laptop.

He loves to giggle, grin, and, recently, wave "bye-bye."  His tongue is his favorite toy, as he sticks it out (and in) in rapid succession, like a giant lizard, flips it over and under and all around works it for all it's worth.  When he's sleepy, lately, he resembles a baby dinosaur, opening his mouth wide, tongue partially out, squawking for all to hear - sometimes a yawn is involved, other times not.  When he's sad or hungry and wants my attention, he cries, "Mmamamamamamamaaaa!"

He is, by far, our most exploratory baby, often getting lost in one room or another before Mommy even realizes he's missing (blame it on being the third child).  He loves finding new things and, of course, trying it all out in his mouth, feeling it out with that favored tongue.

He alternates between being a most amazing sleeper (13 hours or more) most of the time and spurts of waking Mommy at 4:30 in the morning, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.  He is our only so far to not have completely given up that early morning feeding, but I always know when it's growing time.

Considering when we first met face to face he was capable of little more than gazing, sleeping and eating - unable, even, to support his own head - I would say he has accomplished much in his, as yet, short little life.  Looking forward to seeing what else our little Joseph Peter has in store for us.

Just to give a visual to a little of the above:



1,000 Gifts:
1018. Micaiah, picking up her baby brother
1019. Joseph investigating his sister's face while she sits placidly, watching television
1020. Emmett kneeling to kiss his sissy's face, wordlessly and randomly
1021. Watching a favorite show after a long hiatus - still a favorite
1022. Preparing for a new resident
1023. Finding just what we need at just the right time and place
1024. "Look, Mommy! He's standing on his feet!"
1025. Being pronounced "Super Mommy" by my beautiful daughter

Of Finishing the Trip

In case you feel like you were caught in a cliffhanger, the kids and I did survive the latter half of our trip.  We bid good-bye to Virginia and the beautiful family which therein resides.  And after two further days on the road were able to spend a few more wonderful days with my brother and his family.  And because it's just plain easier, here is the photo recap:

- Joey got in a lot of quality cousin time, and many tackles and pokes.

- He also had great tickles from Aunt Kimberly.  Yeah, family is pretty great.

- "How I Spent my Summer Vacation" by Micaiah - this girl is so plugged in, it's ridiculous.  But she did also enjoy spending time with Kylie (who was generally more happy than this).

- Kim enjoyed the boys.

- In the car ride on the way back from Virginia, I noticed in the back seat Micaiah playing with her brother's Transformer and VW Bug, crashing them together.  Meanwhile, in the seat next to her . . .

. . . her brother was brushing her "My Little Pony" and narrating a conversation between "Twirl Heart" and Thumper.

- Later, he and I played a little game.  He would look at me like this.

 I would mimic his expression, and be rewarded with this (and the accompanying melody of his genuine belly laugh).

 Love this boy.

 - Later, all three napped in the car.  Blissful silence.

- Joey then enjoyed more cousin play-time with his brother's favorite, Nella.

- I also had the privilege of spending a few hours playing Zombie with high school friends.  Jen even held Joey (though she offered him gasoline to play with - ok, ok, it was just a playing card, but still . . .).

- I even met my good friend, Jamie's, beautiful daughter, Alexia, who enjoyed playing with Nella as well.

- Emmett made his rounds getting tickles.  From Aunt Andrea . . .

Uncle Andy . . .

And Grandma.

- Grandma and Grandpa bought the kids' favorite story book that they heard during their library visit in Virginia (the same one Emmett began reciting out of the blue on our road trip back to St. Louis).

- Grandma accompanied the kids and I to the zoo, where we survived the 104 degrees and even managed to enjoy ourselves!

- And Joey met a real life penguin.  He may have been less excited than me.

- Micaiah felt the Penguin House was really cold.  And she'll tell you about it if you ask.

- Joey composed his first piano movement.

- Emmett completed his tickle routine with Grandpa.

- Then, sadly, it was time to say good-bye.

- Though even the good-byes turned into play-time as Micaiah and Amie loved pulling their hugs to the ground and dissolving into giggles.

- Good-bye, everyone!

It was a very busy two weeks but, again, we all survived and I was grateful for the opportunity to spend so much time catching up and letting the cousins strengthen their friendships.

Of Our Mid-Summer Road Trip

The children and I have spent an eventful week traveling and spending time with family and friends.  And we're only halfway through our vacation!

Current highlights:

- Dressing like a cow will always be one of the best ways to earn a free meal (and, yes, some people will do anything for free food).

- Apparently when our car warns us of low tire pressure, it's not kidding.  Good to know.  Also glad the ensuing flat tire occurred after we arrived at our first destination and before it really had to be anywhere else for a week.  God is good.

- A day in the car with three former roommates (or, two former apartment-mates and one former replacement for my space in said apartment), with a beautiful wedding for an actual former roommate tossed in the middle, equals priceless memories and a whole lot of laughter.

- Our children had their first swim lessons from Grandma and Grandpa.  This is what hotel pools were made for.

- While a toddler and a pre-schooler can handle two days on the road (with a steady stream of dvd's to speed the time), a five-month old gets a little more bored and a little more cranky (and suddenly a big fan of the paci).

- The hills of West Virginia, and on into Virginia, are gorgeous for scenery, dangerous for motion sickness.

- Babies playing together is always the best (especially when it's cousins meeting for the first time).

- Eating dinner across from Kevin McCallister is entertaining always.

- Watching cousins play is a blast when you pair a set of girls and a set of boys.  Yes, there is bickering, but I love seeing the little competitions, or when Micaiah comes running down the stairs, dashing from her male cousin, shouting, "Ah!  A giant!" and without missing a beat, her brother, who had been happily playing next to Mommy, instantly jumps up, crying, "Grrr!" to join the giant in his tirade.  Absolutely love it.

- Shopping from a street-side vendor is just fun no matter where you do it.  Well, until you realize the sweaty kids would prefer to not be waiting while Mommy tries on a dress in the middle of the outdoor mall, right over all of her real clothes.  If you buy one an owl backpack, she might be more forgiving.

- This little girl, getting a kick out of her birthday present (tossing them behind her head was a favorite).

- It's too bad we have so many reasons to stay in Mid-America, otherwise I'd be heading home and telling Philip to pack our bags.  Charlottesville, VA is definitely the place to live.  

Interested to see what this next week holds (though, spoiler alert, fairly certain Batman might be involved - I can't be left out, even on vacation!).

Of Enjoying Playtime

I feel as though having some time away from Big Brother and Big Sister is really helping Little J to thrive.  Where he once laid to simply watch his siblings in awe as they scurried about and occasionally tossed a small toy in his direction, he now is left with finding ways to entertain himself (you know, in those moments when Mommy isn't cuddling and cooing and making goofy faces at him).

Laying in his play gym, he grasps for the feet of the elephant hanging above him or the soft ring of the zebra rattle nearby.  He clings to the rattle Momma places in his fingers.  It's like we have an entirely new son.  One who is absolutely enthralled with the toys he only stared at a mere week ago.

 On top of which, he has also begun rolling with much greater frequency.  He had, a couple of weeks ago, learned to roll from front to back but did not employ the tactic often.  Now, however, he rolls and squirms to where every time I look at him he's in a new position.

And, then, of course, there's the ever-present good attitude.  I think this may be the first child we've had who will sometimes (like today) notify me he's awake in the morning with happy squeals rather than a demanding cry.  I really feel like he could be good friends with Buddy the elf, because smiling is totally Joey's favorite, too.

Yeah, I kinda like this kid - and the changes only make him better than he already was.

1,000 Gifts:
539. A rainstorm to compliment a rainy day
540. Birthday party plans
541. Creases in chubby baby legs
542. Children tiptoeing across the bathroom - seen over the miracle of technology
543. "I otay!"
544. The rattle of a baby's play
545. The promise of an evening together

Of Celebrating Spring

I had decided I wasn't a big fan of Easter baskets - not wanting to teach our children to associate this most precious day - the reason we have hope in salvation - as one of colored eggs and chocolate candies (which, let's be honest, would definitely take precedence to a toddler mind).  But since they had been gifted a plethora of small goodies from grandparents and great-grandparents alike (and since we happened to have three such baskets from years past), we filled the baskets anyway.  Though, we opted to present them to the children today so the actual day of Easter could be reserved for celebration of the risen Savior.

And I'll admit, it was definitely fun showering them with baskets of goodies (purchased by others) and spending part of the day outside as they enjoyed the spring weather and a few of their new treasures.  Not a bad day to celebrate the joy of life.

Three baskets ready for giving.

 Entertaining herself with her brother's cheeks before Mommy and Daddy showed her what she was waiting for.

 What is it?

 Micaiah: "Oooh!"; Emmett: "Dandy!" (aka Candy); Joey: "Where's the milk?"

Exploring the contents.  Emmett was kind of stuck on the candy idea and it was hard to get him to focus on anything else.  But Daddy tried!

Micaiah loves new books!

Joey's still wondering where the milk is, but someday he'll appreciate these new stuffed friends.

 Emmett, donning his new hat, waiting for breakfast.

 Micaiah loved sipping milk through her new straw.

Breakfast, compliments of Chef Daddy.

Playing with bubbles.

Micaiah loved dancing with her new sheep.  She's kind of adorable ;)

1,000 Gifts (inspired by the lists here and here): 

213. Seeing an old favorite, back in theaters, with my beloved.

214. A daughter old enough to play games and memorize Bible verses.

215. Resurrection cookies sealed in the oven.

216. "Mommy!" and a hug from a little guy who missed his parents.

217. Breakfast and a clean kitchen compliments of my helpful husband.

218. "Mommy, can I get down on my own?" Always patiently asking before she clambers out of her seat like a big girl.

My Life: My Town

It's no small feat to claim three exits on an Oklahoma Highway, but what else would you expect from the town which can introduce itself as the founding place of Sonic (America's Drive-In) - which would be why we boast five in our relatively small radius - and even a mall (again, no small claim for an Oklahoma).  Of course, we can always look to places like the Honey guy (my personal supplier of home-spun honey by his very own bees) selling on the side of the road to remember our small town roots.