05 July 2012

Of the Pit

The song sprang to mind and it could not help but overflow, "You have redeemed my soul from the pit of emptiness; You have redeemed my soul from death."  And as so often happens, my fingers, ever on the keyboard, clacked along to find the song so I could lift my voice to the real music.  As if my soul's melody is not real.

And I found a video.  A video of this song with images of hungry beings, starved to nothingness - the ones I prefer to pretend don't exist at this very moment on the other side of this very globe, where I sit with my full belly on my plush couch, in my air conditioned home, planning my next meal the the snack I may have in between, not because I'm hungry, but because it's what I do.

And I'm singing the words, the words of redemption and suddenly I cannot feel the fullness of one redeemed, but that pit continues to gape wide.  The pit of emptiness found in a constantly full belly, striving for more - not more of what it needs, but more of that which gives pleasure to the tongue, rather than satisfaction to the body.  Striving for more of that which weighs me down rather than that which lifts my spirit.

Because taking, getting, consuming, never satisfies.

Giving, emptying, pouring - in the broken, yet beautiful, math of God, these actions fill us.

The more I attempt to fill that pit with the things this world tells me I want, the more I remain empty.  Redemption is found in the pouring out - in the true emptiness that leads to the true fullness.

Redeem my soul, oh, Lord, from this pit of empty consumption and lead me into Your full life.

1,000 Gifts:
679. Freedom
680. New art supplies - the beauty of creating
681. Washing off the sweat - a sign of putting that body to work
682. A head of curly hair against my chest.
683. Little guy rolling around on the floor
684. Sparks of fire lighting up the evening sky
685. The boom of celebration
686. Her feet on Daddy's, dancing to the music

Photos from Yesterday:
The paints purchased on our fateful trip to Staples.

Love this kid's smile.

Brothers playing Peek-a-Boo.

Dancing with Daddy.

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